A post on Mumsnet has attracted a very mixed response from users. In the post, user yankeecandlesarebest describes how while out drinking with her boyfriend celebrating his work bonus, he revealed that before their relationship he’d “been with gay escorts”.
She continues: “I walked out and slipped in the lounge and he left for work around 7am and didn’t see or speak to me. I’ve been texting him all day and he’s been avoiding it. He came in this evening grabbed his gym gear and without a word left again.
“I don’t know what to say to him now. My head’s been spinning all day. He’s fine in the bedroom and we do suppose usual couple stuff like holidays, meeting our mates for drinks etc. But the way he said it I believe This sounds terrible but is this something to be worried about? We usually have a chat watch some telly before we get to bed.
A minute after this post went up yesterday, a user commented: “Sounds like it’s over sorry.” While another said: “It partly depends on what he’s telling you for. Is he bi, or gay? And how you feel about it. I would have a talk to him”, which was echoed by a third user, who said: “It Partly depends on what he’s telling you for. Is he bi, or gay? And how you feel about it.
In an article posted to Social Work Toady Magazine’s website, author Dr Loren A. Olsen writes about the complexity of coming out in a straight relationship. He writes, “Research on gay men has frequently focused on fidelity and the capacity to sustain long-term relationships. Yet almost nothing has been written about men who have sex with men (MSM). These men believe they are too straight to be gay. , but others see them as too gay to be straight. Many of them are married.”
It goes on to say, “According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, about 7% of men have sex with men, but gay men are estimated to comprise about 4% of the population. These figures suggest that about 3% of men have sex with men although they do not identify themselves as gay.”
Some people commented on the use of “escorts”, with one user saying: “I’d break up with anyone who used a prostitute, no matter the sex. It’s the most disgusting, entitled and abhorrent behavior as far as I’m concerned.” .”
While another urged the woman to talk to her partner, adding: “Wow … I had no idea there was so much ignorance about bisexuality out there still. OP – you need to have a proper conversation with him about this. no more likely to cheat than straight people.”
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